"Father, my dog just died," the woman sobbed to her priest. "Will you bury it for me?"
"Madam," the pastor replied, "It has never been, nor will it ever be, the practice of the Catholic Church to hold services for a dog."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said the woman. "I would have paid $5,000 to the church for it."
"Wait a minute!" said the priest. "You didn't tell me that the dog was Catholic!"
"God made man in His own image"
GOD HAS A PENIS
A drunken man staggered into a Catholic church, sat down in the Confessional and said nothing.
The priest is waiting and waiting and waiting.
The priest coughs to attract the drunk man's attention, but still the man says nothing.
The priest then knocks on the wall three times in a final attempt to get the man to speak.
Finally the drunk replies, ''No use knockin,' pal. There's no paper."
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